Sunday, December 28, 2008
Email from the Cullens! Oo..
Hi, I stop cars with one hand.Its pretty obvious that I look dead like a vampire, but it took HALFWAY through the movie for them to establish my identity! I guess its a bonus that they make me secretive and mysterious towards the first half. The girls are carried away by this. The guys dun buy it of course.
I guess the only exciting part of the movie to watch is the baseball scene. But its not any different than Charlie Angel's slow-mo pausing fight scenes or Matrix bullet-time fight scenes. And they all went like HOLY CRAP THATS THE COOLEST SCENE EVA!! Pfftt!!
Theres very little action and suspense after that. I guess some girls will outgrow this kind of movie. But there are always new batches of screaming teens who would compare this with something like an Oscar movie. Something like Titanic. But at least Titanic is palpatable. Its an actual tragedy. I climb trees and read ppl's minds. Never mind that I'm immortal. I just give girls delusions of grandeur and I keep playing it and playing it in their heads. And yet they fall for its fictitiousness. Nice!
I tried withholding myself by not giving in too much to the kissing scene. And girls love me for it. They like to be tease this way. Every guy knows that! Oldest trick in the book.
Maybe the book has a story. Its a romance novel. But my movie is really just a promo for it. And/or for the sake of giving Edward Cullen a face so that readers could animate me and fantasise me in the book later.
I can't say that you guys are gonna like it very much. It gets draggy after the 1st time, man. Admit it! The movie sucks that is why its not worth a SECOND look! Good looks will go after a while right? Why can't u guys face the reality that I'm the best looking guy on the planet and thats the only saving grace of the movie and the reason u pay the 8 bucks?
Why huh?
Take it away from here, guys! You're welcome :)
- Edward Cullen
Labels: edward cullen twilight movie vampire robert pattinson
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